EFT Therapy for Couples, Individuals and Families

Two smiling women embracing

EFT Therapy for Couples, Individuals and Families

EFT creates change in relationships. It assists us to recognise where we are stuck, to change our patterns of relating, and to begin to learn to rebuild loving connection.

EFT helps address the core questions we tend to ask ourselves in our most important relationships: Do I matter deeply to my partner? Will he/she/they be there for me when I really need them? Can I count on them to have my back? Do I feel secure enough in my relationship to relax and be my real authentic self?

These questions tend to be at the heart of how we relate to each other. If we get a 'no' or a 'maybe' to any of them, we can be left feeling very isolated and alone, and reacting in some very predictable, but unhelpful ways.

EFT is all about making sense of those predictable but unhelpful ways of relating, and building better, more satisfying patterns that leave us feeling more open, trusting and understood.


De-escalation of Patterns of Disconnection

Significant improvements are often experienced by a couple as they begin to firstly recognise their pattern of fighting and withdrawing, and then to learn ways of de-escalation so the negative pattern doesn’t take over.

Within just a few sessions, couples begin to identify and understand more deeply what is going on when they get caught in their negative cycle of interaction, and begin to reduce the frequency, intensity and duration of these negative patterns. It is often a huge relief as this starts to happen.

A woman with her eyes closed, face lifted to the sunlight

A smiling couple at home

Deepening Bonds of Safety and Asking for Needs To Be Met

Couples can then continue to do deeper work together so that with the greater safety and trust in the relationship, they are able to work together so that each partner’s needs can be expressed and met in ways that did not seem possible ever before in the relationship.

Sometimes to get to this point it is necessary to go back and revisit old deep hurts and injuries in the relationship.

Looking at unhappy partners through the lens of attachment, we see not only what is obviously corrosive in a relationship – that is the turning against each other in conflict – but also what is missing. When love begins to erode, what is missing is the attunement and the emotional responsiveness that goes with it. As responsiveness declines, partners become more vulnerable, and their need for emotional connection becomes more urgent.

— Dr Sue Johnson

A smiling man

Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy (EFIT)

EFIT works with individuals (on issues such as anxiety, depression, past trauma or low self-esteem) to develop healthy emotional processing and expression, and better mental health. Clients are supported to learn to trust their own experience, to accept their own feelings and to communicate clearly with their important others in ways that build more effective relationships.


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Emotionally Focused Family Therapy (EFFT)

EFFT aims to identify and change the patterns of distance or enduring conflict that typically block security and closeness in family relationships. Family members are supported to identify and express their deeper emotions and needs, thereby promoting healthy emotional connection amongst members. Parents are supported to respond to the emotional needs and developmental tasks of their children across the life span, assisting them to build resilience.

“The most functional way to regulate difficult emotions in love relationships is to share them.” - Dr Sue Johnson

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Individual Reading and Research

If you would like more information, you can do your own reading and research here – please see our EFT Video and EFT Articles pages. This will help you to determine whether EFT is a good fit for your needs.